Thursday, April 22, 2010

Marriage is good

Philosophers tell us that in our age where morality is widely seen/ believed to be "an imaginary thing we create "( partly true ), "but don't need "( not true) , we STILL END UP BEHAVING like this (if we SAY we don't NEED a guiding philosophy;)
" If it doesn't work we throw it away"-we model ourselves on the technological age .We worship something ; that's  part of our nature
This worship of , not science, but techniques for happiness, means many people are just searching for a new way, tool  or partnership to be happy with . Psychs call this "a technological fix" and like drugs --its an expensive and exhausting way to live )
Marriage on the other hand, is more boring and predictable. (we are watching that great series "As time goes by" again )
But marriage is still good , and the many in media who promote its failure because their own marriages have failed, are not to be believed.

Still not sure ? Look at the creative tensions at the Sydney writers festival this month.Libertines VS reconcilers like E Gilbert .     Don't be a reactionary all your life!
Or Brisbane On Line where Foxy asks the fair question " Is monogamy natural? "
The answer to her question is yes, if you look at the stats with a long term view in mind . The reactionaries ( the ones who keep trying something different) , in historical reality, are always in each generation proved wrong . Read history, not just the ever present reactionary media .

The reasonable thing THEN is not to be a reactionary.( or give up our childish ways cause we all seem to be a bit that way when we were teenagers ) ; find the working models and prove everything in between.

To believe that " what's natural" provides the imperative is to be predictably reactive and worse --stuck with whatever imperative "you think natural tells you to be" - noone should tell you what to be! you are free (eg stuck in a marriage where that marriage is in name only?)More on happiness later?
Far more liberating to see that life calls us to make the choice to pick the idea apart: to be faithful ; to resist temptation ; to deal with my emotions not live off them ( anti natural) and so on .

Don't be a reactionary - get beyond the mechanics and make decisions and choose /rechoose directions that you can be happy with all your life long!

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