Thursday, February 16, 2012

Getting the best of anger

 In this generation Anger has almost become a sin (Sorry we are not allowed to talk about that - by some , but I am NOT one of those ) .
Previous generations dealt with anger with responses like " Be Angry , but Sin not " ( et al) .   Now that we are not allowed to talk about "sin"  either so perhaps the 2 taboos are related ?  I clearly think so but I am in a minority( Public mood is quickfix,  patchup the  presenting problems) .
Any thinking person in an objective mood recognises that to not talk openly and widely about your problems is not good for your mental health ( see some previous posts on this blog on the subject) .
There are lots of books about how to deal with anger  but it seems to me that a lot of the talk is highly reactionary ( doesn't really cut to the heart of why we are here ) 
To be objective about anger is almost impossible for any of us . 
It seems to me impossible for our individual dogmatics( cf reflections and testimonies which have been good) on the subject of anger and fear to be clearly helpful /cathartic to others .Not only are we not objective about our anger and whether/when it breaks "the sin barrier "but our parents are implicated in teaching us things that may or may not be helpful . Clearly if there was ever something a close friend can help you with, its on the issue of " how am i going here " . Therefore too, a strong case for going to a good experienced counsellor to get some perspective.
Dr Les Carter I can highly recommend ( Making the Best of your Anger) and if you want some group therapy our favourite is The Cosby Show.( its brilliant and funny to boot) Its a bit dated,and  clearly R rated for some post modern reactionaries  who would rather waste their capital resources on the latest book . 

Saturday, February 04, 2012

What do you do with ferals?

One of the most depressing things ever, can be to be faced with human incompetence. The recently funny serious movie on Australia's cane toad problem is like that.
While a few of us have had a bit of fun poking fun at others ignorance and stupidity in bringing in feral animals and plants ,there has been some challenges there for us too.
Our neighbours up the road brought the rabbit to Australia. They are quite nice people, but, you'll be pleased , as I am, to know that "I'm not related " .
When faced with the reality that a decision has been made that is wrong, we can make a big effort to try and distance ourselves from it. We are tempted to say "we are not like them", when we probably really are . If not in that frame we may think we know how to solve "their problem" and rush off to fix it . We like to think we are not related to such people , but would an objective observer of our behaviour suggest otherwise?

While it can make it easier ( less painful) for us , to see the problem only in our brothers eye , there is some therapy available if and only IF we face the problem head on ourselves. After all, as modern genetic research shows us, you and I ( whether you like to admit it ) share the same potential for feralness ( sad but true )
Maybe you don't show it like I do , but its there and you'll be passing some of it on just as I will.

As one who spent lots of years studying and quietly replacing things that are out of place ( conservation and motherhood share some methods )-( like rabbits )I will post sometime a little note on how rabbits have adapted to living without burrows .

Perhaps like in that great game of cricket, we should stop focusing on external differences, one upmanship, "his problem- not my problem" and all that stuff. Whether we start with a 20-20 ,50-50 or a test, let's see who is better at playing the game long term ! You never know till you take the test!
Maybe we shouldn't be limited by our view of our gene pool, but learn to get along . You Have a good day now brother!