Getting the best of anger

 In this generation Anger has almost become a sin (Sorry we are not allowed to talk about that - by some , but I am NOT one of those ) .
Previous generations dealt with anger with responses like " Be Angry , but Sin not " ( et al) .   Now that we are not allowed to talk about "sin"  either so perhaps the 2 taboos are related ?  I clearly think so but I am in a minority( Public mood is quickfix,  patchup the  presenting problems) .
Any thinking person in an objective mood recognises that to not talk openly and widely about your problems is not good for your mental health ( see some previous posts on this blog on the subject) .
There are lots of books about how to deal with anger  but it seems to me that a lot of the talk is highly reactionary ( doesn't really cut to the heart of why we are here ) 

To be objective about anger is almost impossible for any of us . 

It seems to me impossible for our individual dogmatics( cf reflections and testimonies which have been good) on the subject of anger and fear to be clearly helpful /cathartic to others .Not only are we not objective about our anger and whether/when it breaks "the sin barrier "but our parents are implicated in teaching us things that may or may not be helpful . Clearly if there was ever something a close friend can help you with, its on the issue of " how am i going here " . Therefore too, a strong case for going to a good experienced counsellor to get some perspective.

Dr Les Carter I can highly recommend ( Making the Best of your Anger) and if you want some group therapy our favourite is The Cosby Show.( its brilliant and funny to boot) Its a bit dated,and  clearly R rated for some post modern reactionaries  who would rather waste their capital resources on the latest book . 

What do you do with ferals?

One of the most depressing things ever, can be to be faced with human incompetence. The recently funny serious movie on Australia's cane toad problem is like that.
While a few of us have had a bit of fun poking fun at others ignorance and stupidity in bringing in feral animals and plants ,there has been some challenges there for us too.
Our neighbours up the road brought the rabbit to Australia. They are quite nice people, but, you'll be pleased , as I am, to know that "I'm not related " .
When faced with the reality that a decision has been made that is wrong, we can make a big effort to try and distance ourselves from it. We are tempted to say "we are not like them", when we probably really are . If not in that frame we may think we know how to solve "their problem" and rush off to fix it . We like to think we are not related to such people , but would an objective observer of our behaviour suggest otherwise?

While it can make it easier ( less painful) for us , to see the problem only in our brothers eye , there is some therapy available if and only IF we face the problem head on ourselves. After all, as modern genetic research shows us, you and I ( whether you like to admit it ) share the same potential for feralness ( sad but true )
Maybe you don't show it like I do , but its there and you'll be passing some of it on just as I will.


As one who spent lots of years studying and quietly replacing things that are out of place ( conservation and motherhood share some methods )-( like rabbits )I will post sometime a little note on how rabbits have adapted to living without burrows .

Perhaps like in that great game of cricket, we should stop focusing on external differences, one upmanship, "his problem- not my problem" and all that stuff. Whether we start with a 20-20 ,50-50 or a test, let's see who is better at playing the game long term ! You never know till you take the test!
Maybe we shouldn't be limited by our view of our gene pool, but learn to get along . You Have a good day now brother!

The growth of offensive behaviour

Don't know about you but the increasing noise from young stars who don't control their squeals on a lob is symbolic of a problem that is not just theirs.
Sharapova says she is surprised to hear that people find her noisy efforts are offensive. Did no one tell her or was she not willing to hear. I feel sure someone has told her they are but like most of us with some of our bad habits ----we don't listen .
It's sad for any of our young people to find in their  prime that they have faults that people find offensive .Harder still  if they only ever find them once married ( always a few things though so u can survive such offences with love )
Better though they hear about them clearly from their parents, their teachers and us who call them friends . True friends would do it - Do these Stars lack true friends ?  
Whatever happened to self control? Sharapova says noone told her her habit was annoying - she knows now, but why didn't she listen earlier and act to change her ways ? ( blame? ,excuses? , louder squeals,? silence ? )
If you are in any doubt , tell children again and again of their bad habits. ( help the parents) After all, you don't want them to display them publicly like these tennis stars do .
Surely this phenomenon shows clearly the cost of shoddy thinking - the heretical view of morality where " tolerance " means putting up with bad behaviour and not saying things ( lest U offend) .
 Sin doesn't condemn the sinner ,but silence can .U heard it first from that book
I just posted a piece on why we love our mums' - they bother to be heard over the loud squeals. http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=319252338119190

Getting AID and SUSTAINABILITY right

Nothing needs more attention by the next generation of ALL  students than the shallow wishy washy politics of aid and support for the rural poor .  Economic development isn't just about prices - its also about the value of things . Some of this misplaced concreteness is just simply ignorance of extremely complex economic and ecological issues and a quick fix attitude to things like war and drug supply.   Sure we've moved on ( hate that phrase really) from the simple days when handouts to disasters was the only form of aid by governments.
Plenty of positives TOO  in complex effective support for sustainability methods too over many generations with the  missions and their multiple focus which helped to educate the young people so they and their parents can physically and mentally help themselves.
But a huge problem is still with us at home - in our attitude to support competent environmental advice .We don't currently support it . It may seem to you that real support is happening but I can tell you key practical  professional resilience work by our oldest conservation agencies has been decimated. Some of this decimation has been in ignorance , but a lot of it is due to ham fisted arrogance and interference in professional matters by politicians .The Fabians and lefties themselves have forgotten their old mentor G B Shaw  who in writing a book on the subject recognised the huge danger from the evil that can origin itself from good intentions only.
Educated agricultural scientists too STILL get dragged in UNsustainable directions.   Our cultures attitude to agriculture as an industry is far too production  orientated  and DPI agencies across the nation are now decades behind in supporting sound sustainability research in many areas. We even export unsustainability because our approach to technology reflects secondary imperatives rather than primary industry ones.     I know this because my profession of applied resilience research has been decimated even in Australia  by patronising and misdirected concerteness in the area of sustainability .Quick fix by the Green parties too has not been  helpful .
Be green , but ONLY LISTEN to professional independents who study before opening their mouths on the subject.  Otherwise ignorance and speculation may be your master.
Unless the 1% of us who work with the 1% (of our countries rural) , 98% of Australians are prone to getting rural support half wrong . The greens movements too will just have a legacy of straw moves unless they support mainstream science and parliament on matters of conservation . ( the job is simply too hard for pollies but they do try  ) If you have any questions please put them here  ( NSW farmers just got their crops downgraded from profitable to broke threatening them in Dec 2011) You can learn more about a resilience career  here .


Footnote AUSTRALIA 2012
Canberra was never fully in touch ( even in 1980) with the professional edge of rural resilience support but ,  in 2011 it is completely lost,  because the profession is lost . No quick fix NOW by the Feds would be welcome as even the regional support mechanisms  for rural areas in our own Country are on the nose around the country ( we have people who run our hospitals and councils and care centres who leave the area at weekends )  Common patraonising responses to disasters also doesn't help us either because we live with drought and floods .
What we can't live with is more quickfix political nonsense to solve OUR problems, more quickfix about free trade and ignorant   directions on ecological imperatives from half educated city ites. Is anyone really listening ? Hope you are-- that would be great . Let us know U are and all the best with your career.

With understanding comes hope

When things go well,  we often get too comfortable with our own rhetoric. That too is" our own personal support for our own rhetoric about how clever we are to be so rich" .  The question of what makes our communities rich is a increasing a question on very few persons lips.

 This reality means our perspective on what makes the economy work is quite suspect .Too comfortable on many fronts
My problem as an advisor to various governments over 30 years is that they are more at sea than ever over just how government's should interfere in matters of a private nature . They even worry too much about words like interfere . Caring leaders interfere carefully - its when they interfere carelessly that the support for public authorities is weakened - a role they will increasingly need to take up as communities suffer the extreme wealth contrasts of post modern economies .
While I have never lost my confidence in prevention science , many advisors have little connection with the paradox that both  of symbiosis and competition must work together to make economies productive . 
In wake of greed protests, I hope some public spirited organisations will more deeply consider research how market worship has many weakened political parties?

We all have a lot to learn - especially about how to live with limits

Patrick Moore has learnt a lot about what really is important by being heavily involved with environmental pressure groups like Greenpeace . What I like about this work is that it is based in experience (and study) and provides a stable hope and opportunity for young people to study and work on ways of improving the earth that actually work .http://www.facebook.com/pages/Dr-Patrick-Moore/191749637503866

Let being the best you can be --be your ambition and your reward

Waiting around for people to encourage you can be real downer -nobody seems to be there when you really need them.  Read this
Worse, it seems  -we all have our weak points and kids at school or people who feel threatened by you , can hang it on you , bringing you down .; often deep cuts are attempted .Parents can seem like that even . (You might have guessed by now that I believe that nothing is "as it seems" on the surface and if you go there get that you''l go places - great.

Worse ,it seems , when you really want some human face to tell you where to go and what to do - what you are likely to get in return is the very  opposite of what you need or is just plain shallow and superficial  .
Being alone with your own problems is a threat --but its also an opportunity .As teenagers its especially hard because you are learning to be yourself - not a clone of your parents - the process of finding out what you really think is a good thing,  but a very lonely thing ; I am thinking of you at this very moment as i write this ( not that it might be all that much help to you)
Worse , it seems, even the advice you get from others may not help . It doesn't matter whether its the Bible , The Quaran of the Shrink , you are not meant to be told - you are created to find out for yourself . Scary isn't it ,

Worse , it seems,  you don't look normal . If its a help, remember that that condition, at least,  is not your problem . But let's be clear here . Everyone else has got the same problem as you,( if its really a problem)  so-- is it a real problem or just one your mind and your friends keep sharing with you? . What we get is what we get but  what we make of whats unique about us  makes us really successful and unique. Glass half full is what we can really enjoy cause its our glass. Glass half empty is only  for the never satisfied .
Some girls have stunning faces but short fat  legs .Blondes may have more fun but some are quiet and make sense not noise when they talk . Some  bullies are strong in body but not strong in mind .  You might have a big nose  but be the funniest and friendliest person on earth( I won't name that famous person ) So forget what others worry about - move on and be yourself and learn to accept who you really are- including your unique gifts ( tick the bold words above)  ---make a list of your very own

Once we accept that we  aren't perfect and we need to be forgiven daily its not so hard to go forward .
The trouble is you don't know just where to go and few they be that can help you ( esp when you are young)  .The point is you don't know what you gonna be and neither frankly does anyone else . The great thing is that great things are YOUR choice - what you are in 30years will be partly who you listen to who you care about, who you admire .The freedom we find when we are teenagers is scary.  
Learning to know what you believe in is helpped by doing stuff - esp for others . The trouble will be nothing happens instantly because soem things the TV says you will get you never do or you get something that makes you look cheap too .
Worse news if trying to do what you think you should do ,others may try to pull you back ( to the pack thats often going nowhere ) --  things often get HARDER not easier . You need impossible help stuff to keep going .
Go find the truth about what really works to the best out of life  ,  I say. Get others to be honest with you and be honest with yourself and with God - that way you can see yourself for who you really are ( the first hurdle many never jump) and those bad impressions people get for what they are ( just impressions ) - For you a failure is learning , just an opportunities  to grow  - be better ( not just a clone of the classroom clown whose dragging the place down )

More  here  
Great book
Don't Peak at High School: From Bullied to A-List, published by Affirm Press, will be released on July 18.

Wendy Harmer, comedian, author and presenter


Born with a severe bilateral palate and lip, teased
at school as "Eagle Beak": "My father never gave
me an inch, never let me feel sorry for myself. It
instilled a level of stoicism that I don't have for
my own children. If I found out my kids were being
called names, I bet I'd be hauling off to the school
and standing at the gate with a baseball bat."

If you are still searching for info about whats best for you - I can't tell you , but I know a way;  a partnership arrangement that works  .
If you think  I haven't helped much . Let me repeat this ; to be the best you can be doesn't require me to tell you,( or any book ) but you to tell you . You were made that way ( Latin truth is Imago Dei) . With all that power to do well and chose well, go well my friend . 

Be the individual unique person God created you to be . Logically it means our individual walks are often lonely and hard. Don't be tied down to some soup of conformity and predjudice that stops you grabbing the hard edge of the mosh pit  -beyond which is your potential unique success from growing and developing in your own way . You have to get away from all the noise to do this and practice getting it right  ; Think of anyone who is successful!  Ask me some questions if you like . 

Read more: http://www.theage.com.au/national/beating-the-bullies-from-butt-of-joke-to-last-laugh-20110618-1g9b9.html#ixzz1Px5y7yr1