Thursday, April 22, 2010

Can you be happy though married ?

Yes absolutely.  If anyone can say it, its us old folks . The TV series "As time goes by" says it , Homer and Marg say it and the  couples in the "The Good Life " say it it so well.
They don't say its easy do they . Of Judy dench in as time goes by -  "how could anyone live with that grumpy old buff of a man?" . until perhaps you see yourself in him . " or in his kids --" why are you now such a pessimist"  Judy Dench said when the older couple  first met again. cop it on the chin !
So we are not always smiling for sure, but........ as the way to go - you bet so !

Whats the alternative ?--- to monogamy that is
Offering yourself as an experiment in a science project on the subject of what works in relationships( so many silly shallow shows on TV ) is not sound because life is too short and you will get hurt much,  much more than you need to . You only learn what people have learnt before . Only marriage works well enough to be taken seriously . Don't give yourself way in a moment of weakness - let your father do it . Ask any parent about what they want for their children - if you think you know better , youwill  one day find out ( on this subject at least ) that you don't. Sure people who sleep around sell the idea but what are their lives like? Statistically its the only thing that works ; forget the reactionaries , hype and spin merchants ) see below
What really works for happiness is I think , and have experienced , a bit hidden.- even  a bit boring perhaps  !  You may think you need this and that , but what you really need is..........OFTEN ..something entirely different?
Don't be fooled by the superficial and "the excuses"  that trap people permanently ; where they allow themsleves to get stuck: The good lasting things are worth working hard at and worth working TOWARDS.
Mire is still mire .and a mess is still something we are never happy with long term ; So clean up your thinking  rather than claim you/ they  didn't create a mess in  the first place .

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